15 Minutes

15 Minutes

There are some things in life that most people believe will never happen to them. I’m not talking about the personal beliefs that we come up against daily, according to our individual thoughts and habits: ‘Oh, I’ll never get a job,  I’ll never be able to afford my own home, lose weight, meditate deeply, relax…’ and so on. No, not these personal affirmations but rather, those beliefs that we have placed high on our ‘This will never happen to me’ list, like for example, being run over by a bus or winning the lottery or even being in a plane crash. But sometimes life delivers what we least expect.

An Italian woman, I’ll call Francesca, whom I recently met at Ananda Assisi, was visiting for the first time. She had read Autobiography of a Yogi and signed up to the same weekend course that I was on. I could recognize the great hunger she had for the teachings, her silent absorption of our teacher’s words and her thoughtful questions later. We got on easily and after the weekend as we said goodbye, she offered to drop me back to the Il Ritoria retreat where I was staying, before driving herself back to Milan.

It was, in fact, Milan that Francesca was flying back to in 2014, after a routine work trip. She boarded the full and busy aircraft and settled comfortably into her middle seat, looking forward to getting home. On either side of her sat two Lebanese men whom she soon discovered, were part of a small group of nine on a religious tour of Italy. One of them was a Muslim and the other an Orthodox. Over the course of the flight they enjoyed a long discussion on prayer, God and their individual paths to God. She shared with them about her special affinity with Mother Mary and how much comfort she felt from her presence in prayer and reflection.

Having worked in the aircraft supplies industry, when the large aeroplane continued to circle around Milan airport for well over forty minutes, she suspected that something was not quite right. Sure enough, within a few minutes the captains voice and words momentarily stilled the whole cabin. Inexplicably, the wheels of the aircraft were not releasing and they were going to have to make a crash landing on the runway, on the belly of the plane. He assured them that the cabin crew had trained in emergency landings and that the runway was lined with teams of rescue workers: fire brigades, ambulances and emergency medical teams. They would be making a crash landing in exactly fifteen minutes and were advised to brace and inwardly prepare as best they could. Something in his tone alerted the passengers that this might well be their last few living moments.

After a stunned silence, panic and fear tore through the cabin, but Francesca felt strangely calm. Her thoughts turned to her father and she felt an urgent need to say goodbye to him. Turning to one of the men beside her, she asked if he would ‘be’ her father. He nodded with great understanding and as she looked into his eyes, she hugged him and told him how much she loved him. He nodded, held her hand and told her that he loved her too, very much. She then, calmly and with great surrender, folded into the brace position and handed her life over to Mother Mary.

The crash was horrific and as the fires and screaming began, she realized that, miraculously, both she and her Lebanese neighbors were completely unhurt except for a few scratches and bruising. This was the first time that she had travelled with her rosary and she had barely used it. But for some reason she had brought it with her. In an act of gratitude later on, she gifted it to her surrogate ‘father.’

Sitting in the car at Il Ritoria, where Francesca had begun the story, we sat together afterwards in complete silence. Francesca’s words had been spoken with a deep sacredness, the interior of the car felt saturated with love and I could feel Mother Mary’s presence as my eyes brimmed with tears. It was as if time had stopped. We had been in the car for almost an hour, for a five-minute journey. Words seemed too loud to utter now and in divine friendship I said goodbye and walked through the leafy, tree-lined car park and around the corner to the sanctuary of my room. I didn’t hear her car drive off for some time and prayed that she be kept safe and blessed. The thoughts pressed in upon me: ‘How would I have lived my last 15 minutes given no warning whatsoever?’

Everything will be alright

I was reminded of a story that Hare Krishna wrote in his book ‘Experiences with my Guru’ (now published as part of the book ‘Thank you, Master‘) which is an account of his life as a great nephew of Paramhansa Yogananda. The true story was of a close encounter with death on board a sinking steamship on the river Ganges. The ship was en route to the holy Ganga Sagar festival and it was filled with hundreds of pilgrims and some of Yogananda’s family and distant relatives. Suddenly, some 40 miles into their journey, the ship began to sink. Water was coming up onto the decks of the ship. All the pilgrims and the captain were afraid and started running, fearfully, all over the place. Many pilgrims seeing Yogananda in his saffron colored robe, came quickly to him and asked him to save their lives. He replied: ‘Be calm, don’t worry and don’t run out of fear. Everything will be alright. Sit down where you are and pray to God for your lives.’  They did this; praying calmly and after some time the waters went down from the deck and the ship came back up. The pilgrims were full of praise and gratitude to Yogananda, but he said: “No, I have not saved your lives. You prayed to God and so God has saved all our lives.”

Francesca and the pilgrims were saved, but equally, they might not have been. They might well have lived their final moment. In each case, it gave them a precious opportunity to face death courageously with a high level of consciousness. Francesca’s experience was unique. It was not as if she’d been given a time period of a few weeks or months through an illness. No, she had been given a short and exact time frame. Like starting from NOW. Imagine, if you’re reading this, that from this moment you have fifteen minutes left to live. What would you do with it? How would you prepare? Are you prepared?

Master taught us in countless ways, to prepare, day by day, sadhana by sadhana, kriya by kriya, meditation by meditation for our moment of death. He gave us affirmations, visualizations, seva and chanting. He taught us how to pray effectively. In the case of the sinking ship, prayer was what Master asked of the disciples in the face of imminent drowning. In fact, alongside prayer, he and Swamiji gave us more teachings and techniques that we could possibly use in a lifetime. In my reflections, I was hoping and praying that I too, like Francesca, would be able to draw upon my spiritual efforts and find the presence of heart and mind to surrender to God and Guru. In fact, a part of me almost envied her for this experience: to be given our last fifteen minutes knowingly and with it an opportunity to face God and Guru with all that we have within us.

I had not appreciated or understood, until I read Swami Kriyananda’s profound essay ‘The Final Exam’, just how important our thoughts and level of consciousness are at that final moment. This was astounding to me. As a result of such a revelation, Swamiji does not leave the reader floundering in the dark, but offers deep wisdom and instruction for our preparation for death.

In the essay, he shares what he considers to be one of the most important statements in the Bhagavad Gita, at Chapter 8 verse 5. This is in reference to our last moment before death, for he says, that it is the thought uppermost in our mind at that time that will determine where our future will take us – to deeper spiritual clarity and freedom or to the lower or sideways worlds of our final vibration and thoughts. Because of this eternal truth, the way we each live our life, our spiritual efforts towards raising our consciousness and our practice at letting go of our attachments are fundamentally important. Each effort we make will help to transform and raise our consciousness and life force.

I encourage anyone who is reading this blog, to read the essay (here). I cannot possibly put into a few words the relevance to each and every one of us that it has in our preparation for death. He not only explains why it is so important but also gives instructions and a check list of practices to do. However, Swamiji shares in a final summary what he considers to be the two most helpful practices:

• ‘First, try to avoid as much as possible anything that might have a downward or even a distracting influence on your mind. Avoid especially things that might draw your thoughts into negative thoughts and emotions, and toward worldly desires.
• Second, surround yourself as much as possible with uplifting, God-reminding influences.’

I was fortunate to hear Francesca’s story and it gave me much to consider in relation to Swamiji’s essay. In a conversation with a teacher and friend a fortnight or so later I recognized that one of the most important understandings for me in this experience was not so much to be focusing upon my final moments but bringing to light how I choose to live the very next minute and the next and the next. Until my final breath, my ‘final fifteen minutes.’ After all, we never know if we too might encounter the ‘unexpected.’

I hope and pray that we are each fortunate enough to have a peaceful death where we can ascend into a realm of great love and joy and continue our journey home in spiritual expansion.

Blessings

Victoria